The Center of the Universe
by avesnovuelan
Summary: AU, JavaJunkie. Sequel to The Balance of the Universe READ THAT FIRST! The statute of limitations is up, and Lorelai's rapist is back. Dun dun DUN!
1. Paralyzing Fear

**A/N**: Well hello there, hi there, and howdy-dudy. What I bring to you today is a sequel to a previous story of mine, entitled _The Balance of the Universe_. **If you have not read that, do so now!** (Just click on my penname and scroll down until you see it). It sets up all of the background for this story, and this story will make very little sense otherwise.

**A/N 2**: This story is going to talk some about laws and legal processes and detective work. I am by no means an expert in these things. Everything I know I learned from Law and Order. For the purpose of this story, the statute of limitations on rape in Connecticut is 22 years. I have no idea if this is anywhere close to accurate. Deal with it.

**Disclaimer**: Near the end of the last story someone was accusing me of being Amy Sherman-Palladino in disguise. As much as I wish that were true, it is not. My name is Tanya. I am a nursing student from Minnesota with a good imagination and a typing speed of 70 WPM. I am NOT ASP, DR, or anyone else with any sort of legal connection to Gilmore Girls. Bottom line: Everything you recognize belongs to someone else. Detective White is mine, but I own nothing else. Please don't sue me.

Here we go! (He feelin' she feelin' we feelin'… never mind).

From _The Balance of the Universe:_

Luke took the luggage inside. Lorelai sat down on the porch. She was admiring the two rings on her left hand when something caught her eye.

On the front step there was an envelope that they had missed before because their hands were full. On the front there was nothing but the number "10," big and bold. Lorelai grabbed it, thinking that maybe it was some sort of late wedding card and that the ten was something witty and clever that would be explained inside.

Inside was a very small piece of paper, cut from a dictionary. It read:

statute of limitations (noun) : A statute setting a time limit on legal action in certain cases. _If the statute of limitations runs out, the robber can spend his money freely without fear of penalty or incarceration._

Still thinking that it was some sort of joke that she would figure out later, Lorelai went inside. "Hey Luke, come look at this." She called, pausing by the desk in the hall. She glanced aimlessly at the "Hello Kitty" calendar. Today was December 29, 2006. January was on the same page as December, and her eyes fluttered over January 8th. She and Rory always went out on the eighth of every month to celebrate another month of Rory being alive. Lorelai hadn't told Rory this yet, but January eighth was also the date of her conception.

She counted the days. Ten. There were ten days between today and the day of her rape. Suddenly she understood the note. Luke came down the stairs in time to see Lorelai drop the envelope and gasp, covering her mouth with a shaking hand.

--

Chapter One: Paralyzing Fear

Luke took the remaining steps two at a time and rushed to her side in time to catch her as her knees gave out and she fell to the floor. He lowered her down gently and sat next to her, picking up the envelope she had dropped and opening it, reading the note with a confused look. "I don't get it," he stated.

"In ten days…January eighth…that's the day I, the day…the day Rory was conceived." Lorelai was shaking so badly she could hardly get the words out.

"Oh," Luke said, surprised. "So does this mean that the statute of limitations is going to run out?"

"I don't know."

The sound of the front door opening startled both of them. "Hello?" Rory's voice called from the foyer.

"In here." Luke answered.

Rory spoke while she hung up her coat, completely clueless about what was going on. "I know I promised I'd be here when you got home, but Logan surprised me last night. He doesn't get a lot of breaks with his new job in New York, so every chance I get to see him is a treat, and I actually had to bribe him with a month's worth of free foot massages to get him to let me leave at all this morning, and…" she rounded the corner and saw her mom and Luke and instantly shut up.

"I'm sorry…what was that?" Her mom asked, trying to pull herself out of whatever she was thinking about and focus on her daughter.

"Nothing. What's going on here?"

Luke handed her the note. She read it and looked confused for a minute. Lorelai and Luke stood up and moved into the living room, followed by Rory. "What does this mean?" she asked.

"We're not sure, but in ten days is January eighth, which is the day that you were, um, conceived." Lorelai started.

Rory breathed deeply and sat down on the couch next to her mom. "You know, this spring, when I learned about…all that…I did some research. One of the things I learned is that the statute of limitations on, um, on what happened that day, is twenty-two years. I didn't want to tell you because I thought it would just be upsetting, but whoever sent you this must know that too."

"But I never told anyone the exact date. The only other person who knew was…him."

"He knows where we live?" Luke asked.

Lorelai was hardly breathing. "Oh God, no!" she exclaimed.

"Mom, you have to go to the police!"

Lorelai couldn't answer. She was starting to hyperventilate. She covered her mouth with her hands, trying to get a grip on the paralyzing fear that had taken over her body. "Luke," she managed to breathe.

"I'm right here," he answered, wrapping his arm around her and placing his hand on her knee.

Rory ran into the kitchen and came back with a paper bag for her to breathe into. In a few minutes she was calm enough to speak again. "Call the police," was all she said.

--

The Stars Hollow police were there only three minutes before deciding that they needed to call in someone from Hartford. They were all a little surprised when the Hartford branch of the FBI sent agent Stephanie White. She sat down in the living room with Lorelai, Rory, and Luke. Lorelai told her the whole story. She took notes, nodding occasionally and asking a few questions. When she had all the information she needed she said, "I am very sorry to tell you this, ma'am, but I believe that you were the victim of a serial rapist. He raped at least five other women back in the eighties, and as each statute of limitations runs out this same thing happens to each of them. Expect to get another note each day until the eighth."

"Then what happens?"

"According to profilers that we have on this case, this guy gets off on hiding from the law, evading the police, and terrorizing his victims. Once the statute of limitations is up he no longer has to hide from the law or evade the police, so most of the thrill is gone. The first two women were raped again once the statute of limitations ran out. Since then the other three have elected to go into protective custody."

"What exactly does that mean?"

"They go into the witness protection program, change their identities, and move across the country. It's a hard choice to make, but we'd like to offer you that option as well."

"I don't want to do that. I have a life here, an inn to run, friends, family…what other choice do I have?"

"Honestly, unless we're able to catch him, I think that's your only option."

"No!"

"Lorelai, maybe you should consider…" Luke spoke up.

"NO!"

"Before you decide, you should probably know that those first two women weren't just raped once the statute was up. He murdered both of them."

--

**A/N:** My tradition of replying to every substantial review continues. So review now! I have a pretty good idea of where this story is going, but I would be open to suggestions, at least for now. I don't care if you love it or hate it, review!


	2. Creating a Panic

**Disclaimer**: Ey-thay are-hay ot-nay ine-may!

**A/N** I am beginning to realize that there are going to be a lot of non-Gilmore-y things about this fic. It is going to be a lot of suspense and mystery/drama, and not a whole lot of humor. If it gets to be too OOC or dramatic, please let me know. I'll do my best to remain true to the show.

Chapter Two: Creating a Panic

"_He murdered both of them." _

The words echoed over and over in Lorelai's mind. She opened her mouth to speak and then snapped it shut again. Her lungs started to burn, and she realized that she had stopped breathing all together. She sucked in a huge gasp of air, tears welling up behind her eyes. Luke squeezed her hand a little tighter.

Agent White was speaking again. "You should be ready to leave by tomorrow, because we don't know for sure that he will wait a full ten days. We're afraid he might be getting aggressive since he missed his last three targets."

"I…I don't want to do this…Luke…"

"You heard what she said. Maybe it is the best idea."

"It would only be until he's caught," the agent assured them.

"And how long is that going to be?" Lorelai shot back angrily.

"Well, we have reason to be optimistic. In all of the previous cases there was no solid evidence. Anything from the first rapes that may have contained DNA was lost, and the bodies of the two women he had killed had been cleaned too well to recover anything. But in your case we have two good sources of DNA. First of all that bag of things that you say you buried near your parents house. If we can recover that there is a good chance that we may be able to find a good sample. And even if that doesn't work, we have your daughter. Her DNA profile could be used to identify him."

"What do I have to do?" Rory asked confidently.

"It's just a simple cheek swab. I can do it right now if you'd like."

"Yes, please." The agent took a quick sample of saliva from Rory's cheek.

"With this there is a better chance of us catching him. If you would prefer, instead of going into protective custody right away, we could put a police escort on you twenty-four/seven for a few days and see if we turn up any more leads."

"Yes, I would prefer."

"Alright, I'll call for someone now. I'll stay until they get here."

--

Of course all of this action did not go unnoticed by Babette. Babette called Ms. Patty, Ms. Patty called East-side Tilly, and within 15 minutes the entire town knew about the police officers parked outside of Lorelai's house.

"Maybe she and Luke had some sort of domestic dispute."

"I bet it has to do with Emily. Remember that fight they had last spring?"

"I have ten dollars that say it involves Jess. Has anyone seen him back in town?"

When the cop car was still there several hours later Taylor called an emergency town meeting, driving up and down the street with Kirk announcing it out the passenger side window with a megaphone.

Luke, Lorelai, and Rory chose to walk seeing as it was a relatively warm day (for December) and the fresh, crisp air seemed much needed. The police car tailed them at a distance of about twenty feet, driving at the same pace that they were walking.

They met Sookie at the door. The police car parked outside. The officer in the driver's seat stayed in the car while the other officer got out and followed Lorelai inside, standing in the back of the room, eyeing the crowd suspiciously. "What's with the uniforms?" Sookie asked.

"Oh, I'm sure we'll all find out _really_ soon," Lorelai promised sarcastically. They picked a seat near the back. Lorelai sunk down in her chair so that she could barely be seen by Taylor, who was already standing sharply at the podium.

"Townsmen and women, thank-you so much for coming to this emergency town meeting. I have called you all here today to discuss what appears to be some sort of legal problem taking place at the Gilmore-Danes property. Are the residents of that property present?" Taylor scanned the crowd.

"We're right here, Taylor." Luke spoke up from the back. His left hand hadn't left Lorelai's right one since before the FBI agent showed up. His right hand waved at Taylor in an annoyed fashion.

"Ah yes, the residents are present. The town will now present the residents with the opportunity to explain this incident."

"It's none of the town's business!" Luke shouted. Lorelai sank even lower in her seat, pushing her lips together and staring intently at the floor.

"That is not true. Town code one-four-six-seven-two part C clearly states that any illegal activity taking place on town property that puts the residents of Stars Hollow in danger is to be disclosed to said residents to insure their safety. The town then reserves the right to vote on what sort of action it wishes to take to end the above stated illegal activity."

Luke stood up, dropping Lorelai's hand and shouting, "Nothing illegal is going on at our property, Taylor!"

"And how does the town know that? Personally I've always wondered where Lorelai gets the money for those fancy clothes she wears. The sale of illegal substances and/or drugs does fall under the coverage of code one-four-six-seven-two part C."

"My wife is not selling drugs and/or illegal substances!"

"Then what are the cops doing here?"

Lorelai couldn't take it any more. "They're here to protect me, alright?" Lorelai shouted, flying to her feet next to Luke.

"To protect you? Honey we always knew Luke was a bit rough, but I never had him pegged as a wife-beater," Babette chirped from her seat several rows closer to the front.

"They're not protecting me from _Luke_," she replied, shaking her head and narrowing her eyes at Babette for so much as suggesting such a thing.

"Well if not Luke, then who?" Gypsy asked from across the aisle.

Lorelai's response caught in her throat. "It's just that…um…well…" Lorelai looked to Luke for help.

The police officer standing in the back decided that it was time for him to speak up. "It appears that Ms. Gilmore has been targeted by a known serial-killer." He was only trying to help by saying this. The poor thing. He clearly didn't know the people of Stars Hollow.

"What?" Babette screeched.

"A serial killer in Stars Hollow? Who would have guessed?" Ms. Patty wondered.

"That's not possible!" Andrew insisted.

"I have to protect Lulu!" Kirk shouted, running out the door.

Suddenly the whole room filled with chaos. Some people were pushing their way to the door, trying to run home to loved ones. Everyone was talking or shouting. Some people were praying. Suddenly the officer understood what his instructors had meant when they had talked about not creating 'a panic.' "Ladies and Gentlemen, I assure you you are in no danger!" He tried yelling over the noise, but it was too late. Taylor was banging his gavel against the podium. Lorelai, Luke, and Rory took this opportunity to slip out the door unnoticed.

The officer who had been waiting in the car gave them a ride home, leaving his partner to clean up the mess he'd made at the town meeting.

--

"Cops, so predictable," he said to himself quietly, hiding about six feet into the trees behind where Lorelai parked her car. He watched Luke, Lorelai, and Rory walk inside with the police officer. The cop would clear the house and then go back outside to sit in his car for a few more hours until his replacements showed up. He waited patiently for a couple more hours until he saw the last light go off in the upstairs bedroom. Staying in the trees he made his way to the back of the house. He dropped and envelope with a large number 9 on it on the back porch and then took off through the neighbor's backyard to where he had parked his car about three blocks away.

--

**A/N**: I am muy impressed with the amount of reviews I got for the last chapter. Keep up the good work!


	3. Crickets

**Disclaimer**: Not mine. Nothing creative to add to that today.

**A/N**: Nope, don't have anything creative to say here either.

_He dropped and envelope with a large number 9 on it on the back porch and then took off through the neighbor's backyard to where he had parked his car about three blocks away. _

--

Chapter Three: Crickets

Rory went home almost as soon as the cop dropped them off. She didn't want to leave, but Lorelai insisted, claiming that she was safe with Luke and the cops and that Rory needed to get ready for school to start again. She didn't say anything about it out loud, but she was also worried about Rory's safety and thought that she'd be safer with Logan.

The night was passed slowly, with a lot of not sleeping and not a lot of sleeping. They turned the light off at about midnight, but neither went to sleep. Luke and Lorelai lay with their backs to each other for a few minutes before the silence got to be too much for Lorelai. She rolled onto her back, sat up, and asked, "Do you think he knows that Rory is his daughter?"

Luke rolled over to face her, placing a hand on her arm. He was fitting easily into the role of protector, something he had done before but never in nearly as serious of a situation. "I don't know. How long do you think he's been watching you?" he responded.

"I don't know. Agent White called and said that they found my garbage bag. I feel like if he had been watching me all along he would have taken it, since he has to know that it contains potentially incriminating evidence. We can thank CSI for that. Let me tell you, shows like that just create smarter criminals."

Luke chuckled. "You're amazing, you know that? In the midst of all this you still manage to make a joke."

"Yes, well it's my number one defense mechanism. If I do see this guy face to face again trust me, we'll be all laughs."

Luke smiled, and then sighed. "I'm scared for you," he admitted in a rare show of vulnerability.

"I'm scared for me too," Lorelai answered honestly. "Am I being really stupid by not going into protective custody?"

"Yes, but I'm not surprised that you chose to stay here."

"I just love my life so much. And what about you? Would they let you go with me? And wait…did you just call me stupid?"

"No, that's not what I was saying. I just don't see you as the kind of person who up and bolts out of fear."

"Um…which Lorelai are you talking about? I bolted from my parents' house after Rory was born; I bolted out of every relationship I was ever in before you came along. I even almost bolted from our relationship if you'll remember. If I was following my pattern I would be on a plane to Oregon right now."

"But you love it here. You have the inn, which is almost another child for you. This town practically worships you. You've even been getting along with your parents lately. I understand you not wanting to leave all that, but I'm still scared. I'm worried you don't realize how serious this is."

"Believe me, I do." Lorelai paused, resting one hand on her stomach and gently running her fingers over the back of Luke's hand (still placed protectively over her arm) with the other. "Luke, there's something I need to tell you."

"What?"

"I was planning on telling you when we got back but, well, you know how that turned out. I considered telling you while we were on our honeymoon but I didn't want it to kill the mood. I realize that now isn't really the best time to bring it up either, but if we're going to be awake all night you're going to wonder why I get up and vomit at about three AM, and I just think I should probably tell you."

"Tell me what?"

"I'm pregnant."

Crickets.

"Did you hear me?"

"Did I…yes, of course I heard you. That's great, Lorelai! How long have you known?"

"Since right before the wedding. I wasn't trying to keep it a secret or anything, I just wanted our honeymoon to be romantic, and I was afraid that if I told you you'd turn into mondo-paranoid Luke and wouldn't want to have sex because you wouldn't want to hurt the baby, or you would insist on carrying me around everywhere or something like that. And, since my morning sickness has been coming in the middle of the night for some reason, it's been pretty easy to hide it, especially since you're such a deep sleeper."

"Lorelai, this is amazing! Wait…is sex okay?"

"Yes. I looked it up and everything."

"How far along are you?"

"About two months."

"Wow, so…October?"

"Happy Halloween."

"Really? So I guess that pirate outfit was good luck."

"I told you it would be. And you didn't want to wear it. Ha!"

"I'll admit that I did feel pretty lucky seeing your matching wench costume."

"Dirty! I never knew you had it in you."

Luke chuckled. Then his face grew serious again. The light-heartedness and good news had momentarily allowed them to forget their current reality. "So…pregnant."

Lorelai caught his tone. "Yeah, pregnant. Part of me is saying 'Lorelai, you idiot, you have a baby to think about. You should let the police take you wherever they want, just as long as you're safe.' But the other part of me can't imagine going through this without you and the town, and even my parents. That man already stole my childhood. I don't want to give him my adult life too."

"Does anyone else know yet?"

"No. Not a soul."

"Really?"

"Well…Rory. But she doesn't count. You remember how she was before the wedding. She wouldn't leave my side for a minute. She was there when I bought the pregnancy test and everything."

"So have you gone to the doctor yet?"

"I have an appointment for Monday. Oh, and speaking of appointments, we have to go to dinner at my parents' tomorrow night."

Luke made a frustrated sigh. "But tomorrow is Saturday."

"Yes and believe me, they won't let us forget it. Just remember, as far as they know we didn't get back from our honeymoon until tomorrow morning."

"So what are we going to tell them? I mean I imagine they'll notice when we show up with a police escort."

"I guess we tell them the truth."

"Sounds like a great idea," Luke's voice dripped with sarcasm.

"Well…what do you suggest?"

"How about not going?"

"Luke," she warned.

"Fine then, we'll open with, 'You're going to be grandparents again, and yes she's two months along even though we've only been married three weeks,' and follow that with, 'By the way, Rory's father is back. It turns out he's not only a serial rapist but also a serial killer."

"That really doesn't sound too good, does it?"

"Nope."

"What if we call them and tell them we had some bad oysters this week and we're sick in bed, but we'll be there next Friday on schedule?"

"And then what do we next Friday?"

"We'll figure that out later."

"That's good enough for me."

--

You know what they say about the best laid plans.

The sound of a car door slamming woke them up the next morning at seven thirty. "What the…" Lorelai started.

"Don't move!" Luke ordered. He rolled out of bed and crept to the window, peeking out while trying not to move the curtain any more than necessary. "Uh-oh."

"Uh-oh? Luke, who is it?"

"Emily."

"Uh-oh."

"Lorelai?" Emily's voice called from downstairs.

"We're not home!" Lorelai answered back. Luke gave her a 'look,' which she answered with "What, it was worth a shot."

A few seconds later Emily appeared in the bedroom doorway. "What are you doing here?"

"Um, I don't know mom, what are _you_ doing here?"

"You're not supposed to be home until this afternoon."

"Yeah but, you see, we live here. We're allowed to be here. You, on the other hand…"

"I have some things for you; I was going to leave them here to surprise you when you got home. Why is there a police officer parked outside? Has there been trouble in your neighborhood?"

"Not yet there hasn't…" Lorelai threatened under her breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"You told me you wouldn't be home until Saturday so that you wouldn't have to come to Friday night dinner, didn't you?"

"No…"

Emily wasn't done yet. "And then I suppose you were going to come up with some awful case of the stomach flu so that you couldn't come today either."

"Food poisoning, actually."

"Honestly, Lorelai. You know you're not obligated to come to dinner anymore, since Luke is covering Rory's tuition, which by the way I still don't understand. You could have simply said, 'Mom, dad, we're not going to make it to dinner on Friday. We'll be getting back from our Honeymoon and we're going to be too sexed-out to make it."

Lorelai gasped. "Gah! Please don't ever let me hear you say 'sexed-out' again! Luke is paying for Rory's tuition because he is her step-father and he wanted to do something to help her. If you'll remember you guys were fighting at the time after you tried to _take over her life._"

"He wasn't her step father at the time."

"No, but we were engaged and he had the money and he wanted to help."

"That's all beside the point. You could have just said you didn't want to come to dinner. We would have understood."

"Fine then, I'm sorry. We didn't want to come to dinner, but we'll be there next week, you can count on it."

"Fine. Now please tell me what that police car is doing outside."

--

**A/N** I know that's kind of a weird place to leave it, but this chapter is already a good length. Now I know what you're thinking, "Pregnant, really? That's so lame." Well trust me; I know what I'm doing. The truth is that I love the pregnancy story line, even though it is so overdone. I just decided that this fic needs a little bit of fluffiness to balance out the serious drama. Don't worry, I promise it won't be too predictable.

I have a special prize for everyone who reviews this chapter! (Man I'm such a review whore.)


	4. I do but I don't

**Disclaimer**: Just so there's no confusion, here's a short list of things that I don't have: 1,000,000 dollars (or even 1,000 dollars), a college degree (yet), a new car, a boyfriend, internet in my apartment, a cat, or Gilmore Girls.

**A/N**: Sorry about the wait, I don't have internet in my apartment right now so I have to use the library or the computer lab at my school, both of which were closed over Christmas break. I hope everyone had a great holiday!

There were some comments about the last chapter feeling like filler. There was some of that, but remember that 90 of the action on Gilmore Girls happens through dialogue, and often times it appears to be meaningless banter. Understanding the meaning behind it is the challenge to the viewer (or in this case, the reader).

I promised a special gift for everyone who reviewed the last chapter. Here it is: (of course even if you didn't review the last chapter you can enjoy it). It's a link to many of my gilmore girls livejournal icons:

http://smg. Four: I do, but I don't.

"_Fine. Now please tell me what that police car is doing outside." _

Emily's question brought back memories of the disastrous town meeting from the previous day. Telling the truth had been a nightmare. However, not telling the truth seemed like an even worse idea. So she answered, "They're here to protect me."

"To protect you from what?"

"From Rory's father."

Emily's face went white. "Rory's father? But…"

"He left a threatening note, so we called the police. Then we found out that he's been killing his old victims."

"Oh my, oh my God! Killing them? Lorelai, did you just say killing them? What are you doing here? You should be leaving the state, going into the witness protection program, moving to Belize…Luke, do something about this!"

Lorelai leaned over and said to Luke loud enough for her mother to hear, "Do you think now's a good time to tell her that I'm pregnant?"

"You're WHAT?!?!?!"

"Apparently not a good time," Luke answered her.

"Mom, I'm fine. The cops are outside, Luke is here, and I've still got at least nine days before I have to worry."

"Nine days?"

"In nine days is the anniversary of, um, of Rory's conception. Apparently that's when he's attacking. But the cops found DNA on my old sheets and they have Rory's DNA profile, so they've got a shot at catching him. If they don't have any new leads in a few days I'll go wherever they want me to go. Now can we please go downstairs; I need coffee." And with that, Lorelai got up, threw on a robe, pushed past her mother, and headed downstairs.

"You let her drink coffee while she's pregnant? That's so unhealthy," Emily said condescendingly before following Lorelai downstairs.

Lorelai made her coffee extra strong and then took a cup out onto the back porch. There on the steps, she saw the envelope with a large number nine on it.

Emily was just turning the corner into the kitchen and Luke was half way down the stairs when they both heard Lorelai scream. They raced out to where she was standing as she bent down slowly to pick up the large manila envelope. It was surprisingly heavy.

They walked back into the kitchen and sat down at the table, Luke's arm around Lorelai guiding her safely to her seat. She began to rip the envelope open.

"Stop!" Emily shouted. "It could be a bomb!"

"It's not a bomb, mom. That's not the way he works. The FBI agent says he just leaves threatening notes for ten days. None of the other women were hurt before the tenth day." She ripped the envelope the rest of the way and pulled out a license plate.

"I don't get it." Luke said.

"Wait, this is the license plate from my Jeep! That means that he was in the yard long enough to take it off without being seen!"

"How is that possible with Babette glued to her windows all the time?"

"It must have been while everyone was at the town meeting yesterday. Oh God. Oh my God he touched this! What's he going to do next time? He could have cut my brake lines or…oh God!" Lorelai sobbed as she dropped the license plate to the floor and buried her face in her hands. "I'm so scared," she admitted for the first time. Luke scooted his chair next to hers and pulled her head to him, letting her cry into his chest.

"We should probably call Agent White and tell her about this," Lorelai said a few minutes later once she had regained her composure. She was there a few minutes later.

"I don't want you to open any more of these notes, okay? I'll stop by every day to pick them up. Just leave them wherever he puts them. Don't so much as touch them. The crime lab could find evidence on them that could help us catch him."

"Okay," Lorelai said, feeling a little bit reprimanded.

They went outside to look at Lorelai's Jeep and the ground nearby. Agent White called someone from the crime lab to look around. They found foot prints, size 10 men's, in the snow around the Jeep, but they belonged to a very common men's work boot sold at Target and Wal-Mart. Even Luke had a pair. They weren't able to find anything else.

--

"So once Emily and Agent White were gone, I decided I couldn't stand to stay in the house any longer. The Diner is closed for New-Years weekend, but Luke needed to stop by anyway and do some inventory so that he could do the ordering on Tuesday when the suppliers will be back at work. He didn't want to leave me here, but of course my friend Officer McBoring is outside. I told him I'd had enough of him on the honeymoon and that I needed just a couple hours to myself." Lorelai explained, standing at the counter with a coffee mug in her hand, watching Sookie chop celery for the day's soup.

"So you came here? You're not by yourself here, you're with me, and Michele, and the holiday staff. Why didn't you just send him to the diner and stay home?"

Lorelai took a sip of coffee and set it down. "I don't know, I guess being at home without him makes me a little…nervous, or something. I'll just go sit in my office and catch up on payroll or bills."

"Okay," Sookie said, continuing to chop.

Lorelai made no move towards her office. She just stood there, sipping coffee and watching Sookie. "What are you working on?" She asked.

"Just chopping celery," she answered nonchalantly.

"Can I help?"

"Can you…no! Lorelai, you hate cooking."

"That's right, I do, don't I? So…how long is it going to take?"

"I thought you wanted some alone time."

"No, I do, it's just that…I don't. I wanted to get away from Luke with his constant hovering and overprotecting, but I don't want to be alone." Lorelai gave a nice big pout for extra emphasis.

"You know what? It's about time for me to take a break anyway. Do you still have those Uno cards in your office?"

"Yes…you wanna play?"

"You're on!" Sookie said, setting the knife down and clapping her hands together.

Lorelai took another sip of her coffee, pondered it for a minute, and then cocked her head to the side and said, "Hey, this is decaf, isn't it?"

Sookie gave a guilty little look and said, "Is it? Oops, I must have put the wrong grounds in."

"Sookie! Luke got to you, didn't he!"

"No! Yes. He made me promise not to tell. He said you didn't want people to know that you were pregnant right away and so I should just switch the coffee and not say anything. So now you know that I know; can I hug you?"

"Yes!"

They hugged and jumped up and down. "You're pregnant!" Sookie screamed, and then they laughed.

"Hey, so good job hiding the fact that you knew. I would have expected you to crack the moment I got in here."

"Yes, well I've been practicing. Jackson got me a necklace for Christmas and I found it in his underwear drawer, and I still managed to convince him that I was surprised."

"Wow, you've made a lot of progress."

"Thanks," Sookie giggled as they made their way out of the kitchen.

--

Kirk was waiting outside the diner when Luke finished his inventory and decided to make his way back to the Inn to retrieve Lorelai.

"Luke, on behalf of Stars Hollow Security Inc I would like to offer you my services as a private body guard. For Lorelai, I mean, since you don't exactly need a body guard."

"Since when are you a private body guard, Kirk?"

"Well, I'm not officially a licensed guard yet. I almost passed the test the first time. If I had only remembered that a revolver is a kind of gun…"

"What did you think it was?"

"A revolving door. The question asked 'If your client was attacked with a revolver, what would you do?' I said I would call maintenance. Now that I know why I got it wrong I understand why the tester gave me such a confused look."

"Kirk, Lorelai doesn't need a body guard. She's got a police officer following her around 24 hours a day. I'm sure that is enough protection."

"Yes, but does the police officer sleep in your bedroom?"

"No, Kirk, and neither will you! I sleep in my bedroom, with Lorelai, and if the attacker somehow manages to get past the police into my bedroom, I will protect my wife!"

"But you don't have a badge. Or pepper spray. As soon as I pass the test I get to carry pepper spray."

By this point in the conversation Luke was sitting inside his truck, about ready to slam the door in Kirk's face. He said, "Good-bye, Kirk," and then did just that.

--

Back at home that night, Luke and Lorelai were watching Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.

"You want half of my chocolate?" Lorelai asked.

"Only if you eat half of my salad."

Lorelai pondered the idea for a moment. "How about a quarter?"

"You're on." They traded chocolate bar for salad. Both made faces while they ate, but they did it because they knew it made the other happy. After a few bites they traded back. Lorelai ate the rest of her chocolate, then an apple, which she had only been eating in secret for the last two months and could now finally enjoy in front of Luke.

The police officers were now taking turns walking around the perimeter of the house every fifteen minutes, which they were supposed to have been doing all along but had neglected, allowing the second note to be left on the back steps.

He watched all of this from the steeple of the church through his binoculars. He had a perfect view of the cops and of Luke and Lorelai through the living room window (**A/N **I have no idea if that would work with the layout of the town or anything, so if not just deal). He took another bite of his peanut butter sandwich and continued watching. Luke and Lorelai were kissing now, ah, how sweet. And now he's kissing…her stomach? Curious.

He finished his sandwich and put the zip-lock bag back into his backpack. He went down and out of the church, taking the long way through town to avoid the busybodies and well-lit areas. If he did see anyone at this time of night he would smile and nod and keep on walking. He had owned a house in this town for several years now, and there really was nothing suspicious about him taking a late-night stroll. Many of the townspeople knew his face, and that he worked in New York but kept a house in Stars Hollow to get away to on weekends and vacations.

He waited until the lights went out at the nosy neighbor's house, and then crept into her yard. He waited a full fifteen minutes for the cops to make their rounds and then, once they were settled back into their car he once again made his way to the back of the house. He picked the lock of the back door, dropped the envelope on the kitchen table, turned around, and left, locking the door behind him. Just for kicks he stood off in the bushes to watch the cops make their next rounds and then casually strolled back to his house.

--

**A/N**: Review now or I'll send him after _you!_ Mua ha ha ha ha.


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